q&a

-your favourite song

weird people // little mix

– your least favourite song 

nobody to love // sigma — I hate this song because it was mine and my roomates alarm for like two months and it bothered the hell out of me

– 5 things that sum you up as a person

  1. lazy
  2. honest
  3. respectful
  4. kind of a bitch
  5. psycho

-current thoughts 

debating whether i should binge watch an entire season of vampire diaries

-what you think of when someone says “home”

my mum, two brothers standing outside my little house with open arms

-pet peeves 

clicking bones

-thought/opinions on Harry Potter

I’ve never had a strong liking to Harry Potter but I used to be terrified of Dobby when I was little. I’ve seen most of them in cinema.

-thoughts/opinions on Doctor Who

david tennent is my fave doctor. byeee.

-thoughts/opinions on Mean Girls

classic one-liners.

– 3 turn-ons

  1. sense of humour
  2. unique eyes (e.g a colour you rarely see)
  3. big hands 😀

– 3 turn-offs 

  1. if your cocky
  2. disrespectful
  3. smoking

– 1 thing on your bucket list 

open my own smoothie bar.

 

 

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Kayleigh Haywood

As reading and hearing about the Kayleigh Haywood case (if you haven’t read it, I really recommend you read) I have realised how dangerous the ‘internet’ world is.

I had shivers down my spine when my Mum told me the story, though I didn’t know the girl, I felt sick to my stomach. How could two men be so sick and twisted to kill a 15-year-old girl?

Kayleigh had many things and accomplishments ahead of her but those two men had wiped that from her for their own pleasure. A moment hasn’t gone by today when I haven’t though about Kayleigh- I can’t imagine what she went through. She was fifteen! She still had so much to do with her life. I know some people will think that it was Kayleigh’s fault for going in the first place, but she was groomed in and felt safe. She felt safe going to that man’s house, only for it to turn into a nightmare.

If you’re talking to someone you don’t know, please stop, you don’t know this person. We are given talks about strangers for a reason.

You are putting your life in danger by talking to someone you don’t know. My mum told me “if it’s too good to be true, then it’s too good to be real.”

My thoughts go out to Kayleigh’s family and friends who must be going through the most heartbreaking moments of their lives right now. ❤

Shaming people & anxiety

Anxiety can be a real pain in  the arse sometimes, it affects me from doing stuff I thoroughly enjoyed three years ago. I know people have really bad anxiety, and I’m so lucky that I’ve only got it a bit not as bad as other people- I would love to hear stories on anxiety!

I used to be able to talk to so many people without the voice at the back of my head saying ‘they’re going to judge you’ or ‘you’re not as pretty as the other girls’. As I grow, I want people to be proud with what shape or size body they have because everyone is beautiful. It upsets me that people compare themselves to Victoria Secret Models, they are also beautiful but I believe there is no such definition as ‘ugly’.

Of course, you joke with your friends occasionally saying ‘ew they’re well ugly.’ But after being that person for a few years and I’ve hated it. I will bitch about people occasionally because it’s in our human nature to be mean. I am just so destroyed by the people who are affected by everyday comments. People don’t realise how much words can really hurt.

Shaming someone’s body or personality can lead to serious consequences, and I’m talking from personal experiences and other people. I went through two years of my so-called best friend calling me stupid, which actually, in the end made me suicidal and not the girl I was three years ago.

But a part of me is glad that, that girl who called me names for two years has shaped me into the person I am today. Though I will never be able to forgive, or even see the slightest bit of niceness past her. I thank her, for shaping me into the confident and happy person I am today. Going through that rough patch was hard, yes I admit, and I would never want anyone to go through it ever, I did learn a lot from it. I learnt that words really do hurt, they can really affect you in the inside. I literally held scissors to my wrist and said to myself- “I could end this all now.” And it pains me to even think about ending my life over this one girl, who must have been, seriously insecure. It pains me that I didn’t leave a note, and I was prepared to die thinking no-one cared for me. I didn’t say goodbye to my Mum, my dad nor my two brothers. I was prepared to kill myself at that very moment but as I held the scissors to my wrist, a voice in the back of my head was telling me I was stronger then this, and eventually it would all get better.

I know your probably don’t believe it but there really is a light at the end of the tunnel, and it will come eventually. It pains me everyday people give up when they can keep fighting.

Though I have changed, I am left with constant anxiety, afraid my friends will begin calling me names or everyone thinks I’m stupid. It hangs around me like a dark cloud everyday and hopefully one day it’ll fade away.

Please don’t give up,

eutonycerys

New year, new me.

Though that is such a cliche term to use at the start of the year, I wanted it to be true.

In late November, I faced a situation I never thought I would face with this guy. I had liked him for a year and a bit and things went smoothly. I have mentioned on him before and if you want to know what happened before the situation, go and check it out.

Throughout the night, he was dancing with this girl, had his hands all over her the entire night, and it really upsetted me since it was my birthday so at that point I simply said to myself, “I’m done.” and it was true, I am done.

I went through a really weird phase, I didn’t know what to do with myself and I almost felt lost without him but trust me, it was just the hormones. But after a very relaxing weekend in London, it opened my eyes to a clearer world.

I realised there are plenty of other fish in the ocean and I don’t need him, he can fuck off for all I care and so this is  a new start.

And I want you to join along…

Fell for the wrong person?

Though it’s hard to even type this write now, I want to get a few things off my chest. I’ve been crushing on this boy, Rock, for over a year now and until recently he has completely shattered and broken my heart. I had this little thought at the back of my mind that he did like me back, by the small things he did. Eye contact, body language, mirroring. But truly, I was creating these all in my head and making myself fall for him more. How could I have been so stupid to lead myself on- when deep down I knew I would get hurt in the end. It pained me last night to see his hands all over another girl, bitch-face let’s call her, he was whispering in her ear, spinning her around, hands on her waist. Everything I have wanted from him, everything I have dreamed of having with him. He’s only known the girl six weeks and suddenly he’s like “Oh yeah, I really like her.” Does it work like that with boys? Do they always go for the pretty and skinny ones and not the one who was waiting, patiently for them to say one word to you? I’m utterly pissed off, and also very upset. I had spent an entire night, crying, thinking “Why? What did I do to deserve this?” My chest ached and my throat was tightening. I received no sleep. I just want some advice- how do I get over this guy?

eutonycerys. x

Boys. Boys. Boys

Since I am fifteen, I have defiantly grown up to like many boys. Some only finding them attracting, some from a five-minute conversation… I’m a hopeless romantic I can’t help it. Anyway, over this year I have fancied this one boy who I will name Rock on my blog.

I have fancied Rock since September last year, I fancied him different from the way I have fancied over people. I have known him for  at least 3 years but we had never really spoke to each other.

Last year when I was sat next to him in my sciences, he was incredibly charming and very funny. My natural instinct in my body was to fancy him. At first I thought it was just the usual hormones and I was convincing myself to like him. But after about a week or so, it built up to me blushing, butterflies and I knew I no longer liked him as a friend.

I kept it pretty cool if I’m honest and gradually over time I gushed about it to all my friends… well, for five months. When he found out.

It was a pretty chill day, to say the least but I was nervous. My friend, Billy, said he promised me a hug from him and I told him not to tell him I like him. Honestly, I thought he was joking but then he was telling me he was going to do it in Drama and I was shitting myself.

He walked in and my heart exploded with butterflies I couldn’t wait for the hug. But sorry to let you all down, I didn’t get the hug. 😦 INSTEAD HE FOUND OUT I LIKED HIM.

We were on our way to our next science, Billy was trying to convince him to hug me. And he was asking questions like ‘Why does she want it?’ ‘What’s it for?’ Billy kept it pretty cool but then, (imma call this girl blabber mouth) Blabber mouth blurted out that I liked him and my heart DROPPED.

He couldn’t know I liked him, he’s attractive, funny, popular and I’m not.

It became awkward from that point onward, I’m not sure if he knows I still like him but I just glad we’re speaking and are on friend terms again.

Of course I would love to be more then friends with him, I would be jumping over the moon if he came up to me and asked to be his girlfriend but unfortunately he doesn’t like me in that way.

And I really wish he did.

What do I do?

Top Three: TV Shows

I am known for checking out new TV shows and enjoying them so I decided to post them.

  1. Vampire Diaries: I have defiantly got into this show this holidays, each episode is a cliffhanger wanting you to watch more. And can I say how cute each male character is? Damn. Stefan Salvatore can knock on my door anytime. I’m only on the first season and I’m loving it!
  2. Pretty Little Liars: Though I was very disappointed who A was and believed that the finale was rubbish. I have a deep feeling inside of me that still enjoys PLL. This is in my opinion, but the acting isn’t that great. But… I still love it. #guiltypleasure
  3. Keeping Up With The Kardashians: I had been told by many people, that this show was very fake and stage. But literally, I’m obsessed with the Kardashians- they’re style, lifestyle, everything so I knew I had to start watching it. It is amazing! It keeps you on your toes the whole time. I’m currently on season 7 and loving it.

Back To School Advice: #1 Starting High School

Going back to school can be very scary, having to have different teachers for different lessons is a big change. I can recommend you high school isn’t as scary as you think.

Going to my new high school, I felt very grown up, going on a bus (my high school was 45 minutes away) having a locker key, also some money. It was very surreal.

Of course, I was only eleven but I felt like I was starting a new chapter in my life.

MAKE SURE YOU HAVE: 

  1. Notebooks– These are very essential, so you can look back on them and revise. It also prepares you for later life when you have very important exams.
  2. An organised pencil case– Make sure you have the important things, pencils, pens, colouring pencils and pens, rulers, scissors, glue etc. You’ll find high school is very different to your previous one. You are meant to have the supplies yourself, this also shows organisation to your teachers. Also, remember to top up if you lose pens or pencils, you tend to hand loads out to people who have forgot the important things. Just share with friends, because others never bring them back.
  3. A bag– Something is going to hold your bag right? Get a reasonable size back, maybe a satchel: they hold books along with pencil cases. On your first day, your teacher is going to overload you with textbooks and you’re going to be carrying them around on a regular basis.

These are really the important things, but there are a whole lot and I’m sure you will get told on the other things.

Don’t be worried. The first years of high school are the best, you have four years to have fun before exams so enjoy it! If you have any worries don’t be afraid to email me –> cerysjade27@gmail.com